do you ever have those moments when you really need to cry but you just can't? that's kind of how i feel right now. i'm really happy i mean i should be i'm getting what i want i'm moving back to texas. but i can't help but think if some things had gone differently i know i would be staying. i don't regret it. but i'm just sad is all i've made some good friends here a few of the best i think. there are two people in particular that seriously i have never felt more comfortable with in my life. i feel like i can be my total self..goofy and just all over the place say anythin and they won't judge me. what's funny is they probably don't even know it. i also don't like how when i'm about to move somewhere its like i become my complete self in front of everyone. i stop caring what people think because i know i will never see them again. why? see the other weird thing is i'm like one big paradox. i cling to some people and never want to lose these relationships but then theres a realistic lil voice in my head that says well you know you won't ever see these people again (not the ones i cling to but the acquaintances) i know its normal to not feel bad for losing the relationships with people you really didnt have them with in the first place. but what about the ones i want to keep? one in particular i dont think i can lose. like i said before i feel so comfortable with them. its like when i am in their presence everything makes sense in that moment and i dont ever worry about anything. i get lost in the time and never realize how fast it seems to pass. but does this person want to stay in touch with me? i don't know how i will handle that. what if i am running away from the very thing i should be running to? why am i always running? i don't even like wearing tennis shoes.
what a tragedy have to lie to oneself.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment